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Saying I grew up in a conservative Baptist church is the same kind of understatement as saying Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups®are the perfect blend of chocolate and peanut butter. We were suspicious of conservatives who adhered to fewer “standards” than we did…and those standards were high, let me tell you.
Why me Lord, what have I ever done
To deserve even one
Of the pleasures I’ve known
Tell me Lord, what did I ever do
That was worth loving you
Or the kindness you’ve shown.
Lord help me Jesus, I’ve wasted it so
Help me Jesus I know what I am
Now that I know that I’ve need you so
Help me Jesus, my soul’s in your hand.
Tell me Lord, if you think there’s a way
I can try to repay
All I’ve taken from you
Maybe Lord, I can show someone else
What I’ve been through myself
On my way back to you.
Lord help me Jesus, I’ve wasted it so
Help me Jesus I know what I am
Now that I know that I’ve need you so
Help me Jesus, my soul’s in your hand.Kris Kristofferson
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Kristofferson reminded me that, too often, I get the Why Me, Lord question all wrong. I focus on the negative things and wonder what I ever did to deserve them. Instead, I should remember that if it were not for grace, the negative things would be all there were. But for the grace of God, it is all suffering, pain, loss, and, ultimately, hopelessness.
What if the purpose of my pain is to ease the pain of another? What if what I suffer is not about my suffering but about how I handle it? What if there is someone somewhere this close to being forever lost and how I handle my pain either points them to or from the Cross?
I wrote Holly a letter and I will only share this portion because I think it is helpful to us all: “When one day you exchange your cross for a crown, you will see every way you mattered, every life you lifted, and every load you made lighter. ‘To live is Christ and to die is gain.’ Keep living. Keep loving.”
Like Kristofferson sang,
Maybe Lord, I can show someone else
What I’ve been through myself
I will try to remember this and also to believe this…
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, to give you a future and a hope. ~Jeremiah 29:11
And this…
And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. ~Romans 8:28
Maybe the next time I say why me, Lord, I will mean it the way Kristofferson put it…as an offering of gratitude and commitment to doing something good with the grace He has extended me and the blessings on my life.
