Doctor Love's Valentine's Day Advice for Girls

Let me begin by saying I dislike Valentine's Day and always have. I think an act of love on a random day for no particular reason has far more meaning than a bouquet of flowers, a box of candy, and a mushy card given on a day when you have no real choice but to do it.

That said, every girl loves a good valentine and my girl is no different from the rest. She loves roses, assorted chocolates and sentimental greeting cards just as much as the next girl. It is a genetic predisposition for the female of the human race.

Every girl wants to be loved. She wants to be someone's "prettiest girl in the whole wide world." She wants to be the apple of some man's eye. She wants to be the princess.

But too many princesses end up with fat, selfish, warty toads. They live the fairy tale in reverse: they kissed the prince and he turned into a toad. Your main man Dr. Love is here to make some suggestions for avoiding a life with a lily-pad squatting toad...

  1. Beware of the "hot" guy. It is a rare thing indeed for a pretty boy to be faithful and true to one girl for a lifetime. If a guy is overly impressed with himself, he will never be overwhelmed by you. Monogamy is a difficult enough concept for the male of the species to begin with. There is not one "hot" guy in a million who can constantly be told he is gorgeous, constantly be fawned over by "hot" girls, and remain faithful to one lover.
  2. Look for the guy who thinks you are beautiful over the guy who thinks you are "hot." Beauty is rare. It is precious and enduring. Beauty is love. "Hot" is lust. It is also a fleeting, flavor-of-the-month thing. Fifty years hence, you will probably not be on anyone's "hot" list. But to some man, you will remain the embodiment of beauty.
  3. Remember that wealth is not a virtue, but neither is poverty. You may believe that all you need is love...until the rent comes due. Or, you may think you can live without love if the square footage is adequate. You need both security and intimacy. Don't buy into the concept that you have to choose one or the other.
  4. Look for character rather than a character. He may be the life of the party, but if he has no internal compass governing his motives and guiding his actions, when they turn out the lights, the party will be over.
  5. If you get sick and cannot make a date and he comes over with soup from your favorite deli, if you don't want him to see you looking like death warmed over and he ignores your complaint and comes over anyway, if he spoon feeds the soup, if he kisses your fevered forehead and doesn't even see the dark circles under your eyes, if he says—and you know he means it—that you never looked more beautiful and he never loved you more than right then, say "I do" and live happily ever after.

True love is...

More fragrant than a dozen fresh-cut roses...

Sweeter than a box of chocolates...

Truer than the words of the finest Hallmark card...

Worth the wait.